Too often in the Western world, negotiation is seen as the domain of union officials, real estate agents and used car dealers. We expect a certain amount of negotiating when making some purchases but we fail to see how much more we could be getting out of life simply by asking! I don’t think I’ll be using all of the hardcore tips from Tim’s article, but it did a great job of reminding me that we need to look at life from time to time and say “Is that the best you can do for me?”
Don’t settle for what’s being offered just because you’re afraid to ask some questions that may seem uncomfortable at first! You’re life is worth more than that – isn’t it?
I, Patrick Mathieu, have given up my quest for happiness.
That’s right, I am no longer striving to achieve happiness.
A few weeks ago I wrote about my happiness experiment. I also wrote about how I thought that the key to happiness was in carefully choosing your reactions. But now I’ve come to realize how foolish that is and I’ve given it up.
Why? Because “happiness” is a noun. A thing. A thing that can be lost or found. And I now realize that I don’t want to have happiness, I want to be happy.
The difference isn’t just semantics or word games. It makes a real difference in your life whether you are chasing some elusive state of mind or actually embodying a way of being.
So I am going to BE happy.
Correction – I AM HAPPY.
The Power of Mortality™ is about cherishing your life and recognizing it for the “limited time offer” that it truly is. By forcing ourselves to come face-to-face with our own mortality, we come to realize that underneath it all – we are happy to be alive!
Not convinced?
Imagine that you were drowning and someone pulled your head above the water so that you could breathe fresh air. In that moment you would understand just how happy you are to be alive. So the next time you are having trouble finding happiness, I invite you to hold your breath. And keep holding it. Hold it … … … until you remember that you’re happy to be alive.
Happiness is being.
Everything else is a story that we’ve added on to make things more complicated.
- Are you one of those people that needs to ALWAYS have things planned out?
- Are you someone who needs to have a contingency plan for every possible outcome?
- Do you usually hold off on making a decision until you have ‘all the facts’, but never seem to get around to taking action because there may be something else you aren’t considering?
If this sounds like you, I want to give you some advice that might just be very liberating for you. Either that, or it will be completely terrifying for you!
Life is meant to be LIVED, not planned!
So many people today use ‘planning’ as a delay tactic to hide their fear.
Fear that they will be wrong
Fear that things won’t ‘work out’
Fear that they will look foolish
And since fear is such a pervasive part of our modern society, we completely justify this obsession with planning as a ‘responsible’ or ‘rational’ thing to do.
Don’t misunderstand me. I’m not advocating that you make snap decisions or rush into action. I’m saying that life is a full-contact game and if your strategy is to mentally play out every move to its logical conclusion before you start moving, you won’t actually be living – you’ll be staring at a clipboard on the sidelines until the game is over.
Now I’ll bet that 20% of you are saying: “Thanks Patrick, but I already spend more time in action than in planning”.
20% of you are saying: “You know what? I do plan too much and I like the idea of getting into action more quickly. I’m going to give it a try! Thanks for the push Patrick!”
10% of you are saying: “Patrick, are you crazy? Give up the comfort zone that ‘planning’ offers me? Never!!”
But I’ll be there are at least 50% of you who are saying: “You know what Patrick, I think you are on to something here! It sounds like a good idea and it definitely warrants further research. I’ll add that to my ‘to-do list’ and look into it as soon as I get a chance.”
Well, if you’re in the last category I’m not letting you off the hook that easily. I’ve put together a reading list for you.
And for those of you that don’t want to wait to start researching, read this fascinating interview that Tim Ferris (author of the Four Hour Work Week) did with invention guru Stephen Key and pay particular attention to question #2.
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